A member of my family has told me that I’m paranoid about electronic pianos.

What nonsense!  I loathe them, of course, and they make me very angry because of all the damage they have done to congregational singing.  And they certainly do keep turning up in churches and funeral parlours where I am asked to play.  It’s as if they are following me around.  Well, not ‘as if’.  They are following me around.  It’s part of a conspiracy to get at me for telling the truth about them, that they are planning to take over all the churches in the world …

Hmm.  Pause.

I think I’ll stop posting about electronic pianos.  The next major blog theme will be those much more rewarding objects (relatively speaking), electronic organs.

( … and can someone please call the police and ask them to arrest all those electronic pianos gathering in my garden and preparing to attack … )